Cultural Nuances

Its raining outside, so we aren't planning on leaving the hotel with the usual franticness that we normally have. Paul is watching Chinese cartoons, and managed to find an English program on the TV - a broadcast of the play Oklahoma with Chinese subtitles and the occasional voiceover. I imagined the voiceover saying "Western plays are very weird".

One time a couple of years ago my friend Lisa and I went to a Chinese restaurant for lunch. After we had finished, and I stood up to put my coat on the waiter walked up to me and said "You have great height". I smiled and thanked him for the complement, then left. Although I did take it as a complement, I really did not understand the depth of it until I came here.

People are obsessed with my height. The other day Paul and I were at Tianenmen Square standing at a fence taking in the scenery. A man road by on a bike and instead of watching where he was going, he was watching me and veered into traffic in the other lane. A little further on a lady stopped me and asked if she could take a picture of her 3 year old daughter with me. There have been numerous other people snapping my photo along the way, too. It wasn't until Paul's friend David was with us that I understood why they keep taking my photo. David translated a conversation he had with someone, and the person asked if I was an athlete. I was quite chuffed with it, considering how dreadfully out of shape I am!

After I few subway rides, I learned to duck to avoid hitting my head on the way out. I cannot walk under trees as the branches are not cut high enough for me. Once of the funniest moments of the trip so far was when I ducked to avoid hitting my head on a sign, then made Paul take a picture. It took a bit for him to get the picture set up, and as I was standing under the sign countless people walking by turned around, pointed at me and laughed. I've been having a lot of fun with this!

One of the first things I noticed when I got here is how devoid North America is of smells. When Paul and I first arrived and were wandering around the neighbourhood, I could notice a smokey meaty smell as we walked down a couple of different streets. For the most part I don't miss the blandness of North America.

On Tuesday when Paul and I got to the Olympic village I had to go to the washroom. I went to use the port-a-potty and as I opened the door I noticed that there was no toilet, only a hole in the floor. I had a few seconds to learn how to squat to pee. I had two concerns over the whole experience - peeing on my shorts and falling in the hole. There was sudsy water in the hole, so the experience was not that bad.

My next experience did not fare so well. There was no sudsy water, and as I squatted all I could smell was raw sewage. After a couple of dry heaves I decided I did not have to go that badly and would opt to hold it until I had the urge to "p*ss like a racehorse". On a happy note, I still have not fallen in the hole. I have learned to bury my head in my shirt to breath while going to the washroom to avoid projectile vomitting all over it.

I have also become adept at haggling. Paul, David, and I were walking down a huotong full of vendors. I managed to avoid most of them by flashing my wide dimply smile and saying "no thanks". We managed to get through most of the street without stopping. Then as I walked by one vendor, the girl was asking me to come look at things. I flashed my best dimply smile, and she grabbed my wrist. She seemed very sweet and entertaining, and I did not have the heart to be rude to her so I went into her shop. She showed me various paintings so I asked her how much a particular one was. She pulled out her calculator and said "Normally the price is 900 (Yuan) but because you are very beautiful and very nice I will give it to you for 325. Where are you from?"
"Canada"
"Oh, since you are not American or Japanese, I will give it to you for 300"
Just then David popped his head in the door to check on me.
"Oh, since you have Chinese friend, I will give you Chinese price of 275. Final offer"
"No, I really do not want the painting, but thank you"
"Ok, ok, 225, best price"
"Really, I do not want the painting but thank you"
"Ok, you tell me how much
"Really, the painting is nice, but I just do not want it."
"Tell me how much"
At that point Paul and I started to talk to each other in French to outsmart her. She watched us for a couple of minutes, then joined in the conversation. We laughed.
"ok, 100"
"no, no that's too low. This is real silk with nice rice paper and a stamp of authenticity on it.'
"I really do not want the painting"
"Ok, 125."
"ok"

To tell the truth, I really did not want the painting and I felt I could have gone much much lower, but did not wish to insult her. What I really paid for was the memory of my first experience of haggling and the memory of how entertaining she was.

Well, I have so much more to say, but the staff want to clean the room, and I need to go find some coffee.